It’s Okay If You're Struggling With Self-Love Right Now ❤️
'Not knowing how to love yourself doesn't make you unloveable.'
Welcome to the Collective World X Thought Catalog Newsletter. Collective World is a one-of-a-kind creative network powered by the minds and voices behind The Thought & Expression Company. We’re so glad you’re here.
Here’s the thing about self-love: It isn’t easy.
It’s not something you wake up one day and just feel. You can’t just will it into being. You can put in all the work and do everything every self-help guru says—speak out every positive affirmation, delete every social media app, write down every tiny thing you’re grateful for in your journal—but sometimes even that won’t be enough. And in those moments, you may worry nothing will ever be enough.
The problem is that we teach people that feeling this way is somehow wrong. Too often, we’re told that if we don’t love ourselves enough, then we need to be fixed. We’re told that we’ll never know happiness until we know how to find it within ourselves. We’re told we’ll never find love until we love ourselves first.
But the truth is this: Just because you don’t feel like you can love yourself right now doesn’t mean that other people don’t love you exactly as you are. It doesn’t mean you aren’t enough or that you can’t find the joy in life. Your internal world is important, but it isn’t everything. Because even when you struggle to find the good things inside of you, there are still good things all around you. And even at your darkest, you’re still somebody else’s light.
As Stephani Shaner so authentically put it, “The road to showing yourself healthy self-love is not linear and there will be times when you look back and wish you would have done things differently.” And that’s okay. That’s normal. It doesn’t mean you’re doing self-love wrong, it just means you’re human.
So if you’re struggling to love yourself right now, read these words from Courtney Dercqu: “Your journey of self-love will always be up and down, and it’ll always be easier said than done, especially when life seems to be just a bit too much. But loving someone else—a partner, a friend, a relative, your dog, even your favorite TV show—isn’t impossible while you learn to love yourself. You’re full of love, even if you don’t realize it yet.”
Know that what you’re doing now is enough. You are enough. No one can take that away from you, not even you.
What We’re Reading This Week 📖💛
“If you’re going to cede the power of the last word to someone else, you’d better be damn sure that person deserves it.” — Jennifer Senior
“And when you feel low, as you are all but certain to at times, I hope you remember that this feeling isn’t the destination. It’s just a part of getting there.” — John Paul Brammer
“I’m a ghost, and I’m in a spaceship, and I’m hurtling through the universe.” — Vauhini Vara
“Things get broken, and sometimes they get repaired, and in most cases, you realize that no matter what gets damaged, life rearranges itself to compensate for your loss, sometimes wonderfully.” — Hanya Yanagihara
“Found family is important. They take care of you when your own family can’t get to you. Or you won’t let them get to you. Or they aren’t around to get to you at all.” — Scaachi Koul
“We need softness, we need the people who remind us of connection when we are all avoiding eye contact.” — Bianca Sparacino
“We often measure the value of love by the amount of time spent loving, but perhaps that’s not an accurate gauge.” — Molly Burford
“If our identity is tied to people pleasing, to a set of rules/beliefs, or to a role we play or other people, self betrayal becomes our norm.” — Dr. Nicole LePera
For more reading recommendations follow Quote Catalog where we find and file the best things to read every single day.
Let us leave you with this:
“To know yourself means to unlearn
who you think you are
who you think you’ve been
and who you think you are becoming” — Taj Arora
Have faith in your journey. ✨